This Ship Might be A-Sailin!!!!

Come on animals...hop on board...this shit sails in less than a week!!!

Yeah...okay, so its now been a week since I have been home. I have a chest cold that is kicking my ass, which has kept me from wandering down to the I.P. and starting the first leg of my 'stay at home' job. You got it, I am going to try my hand at being a 'cash game player.' Putting in 4-5 hour shifts. Cutting losses when I must, leaving when I am up a set amount. You know...a 'real' job-like strategy. I am really going to try NOT being on the road so much this year. I mean, some events you just can't help not missing out on...Borgata, a few various circuit events. 

In the week that I have been home...it has rained every single day. I couldn't buy a drop of rain before I left...now its ridiculous. The backyard is like a swamp. I decided yesterday that it might be a good idea to start construction on an Ark. I mean, 2012 is just right around the corner. The tough part is coming up with a way to locate two of every animal on the planet. What a pain in the ass!!!

I am attempting to watch 'Inception' for about the 5th time. I have never been able to figure it out. Does that make me stupid? Maybe.

I see the latest poll on the right has closed. I don't know if I am supposed to be shocked, or pleasantly surprised, that the #1 chosen thing that people would want to accomplish before they die was 'Find the Cure for Cancer.' Are you guys being sincere? Or is it just the 'feel good' answer? Out of 23 who played the game...12 of you picked the cancer option. Only 2 of you wanted to win the WSOP Main Event. The other top three...all with three picks...were 'Win the Lottery,' 'Be the President of the US,' and 'Save Someone's Life.' Guess it's time to come up with a new poll.

Congratulations to the NFL for working out their differences. They seemed to have kept the details of the new CBA pretty hush hush. I guess I really don't care that much, as long as both sides are happy to the point that we wont have to worry about another work stoppage for 7-10 years. All I know...is that I can now get on about the business of getting my football pools and fantasy leagues fired up...and not a moment too soon. My fantasy baseball team is in the tank...and my freaking Seattle Mariners...who on July 5th were 1.5 games out of first place...have now lost a franchise record (the MLB record, btw...is 23 games) 17 consecutive games. And most of them they either led, or ended up losing by 3 runs or less. What a nightmare. So hold the 'your team sucks' jokes. They really don't SUCK...in fact, they have phenomenal pitching...they just can't hit their weight. 

Spent twenty minutes looking at Squirrel's 'US' magazine today. Why? I don't know. Wanted to hear why J-Lo and Marc Anthony split. Didn't learn much. But what I did learn...is that I am so freaking glad I never made it big in acting. My gawd....they have a picture of all these actors...caught doing 'everyday' activities...tying their shoe, using their ATM card, filling up with gas...you name it. I am absolutely stunned that enough people find this shit interesting enough to keep buying these magazines. What a joke.

There is a new game on the Zynga network capturing my attention. 'Hanging With Friends' which is a bit like a cross between Hang-Man and Wheel of Fortune. Its pretty hard. I'm a little surprised that I am spending the amount of time I am playing a game that has no financial benefit at all.

Last night, I had a really strange dream. My Mom had been carrying around this secret her whole life. How to make pay phones start coughing out quarters. She would do this weird thing where she picked up the phone...hit the plunger a few times...push some buttons on the keypad...then click the plunger again...and all these quarters came flying out of it. Whoa! Eventually, of course, this dream deviated...to the point that we were driving down a road in the car...and making huge quarter scores. The phone was in the car? No idea. Go ahead, Dream Doctors...figure that one out!

I hear the fields up in Tunica at the Goldstrike tournament have been great. Good! Glad to hear. First of all, for Tunica....after the floods it was really important for them, I think...to have a strong turnout for their first big poker tourney since they re-opened. Also, happy for the dealers...who I'm sure needed to make some money. And of course, for my fellow players, who are playing for 5-figure scores...which is always nice. I would have loved to have got up there for those tourneys...but honestly, Squirrel would have likely snapped if I had gone up there, after being gone all summer (7 weeks) in Vegas, spinning my wheels and coming home in non-glorious fashion.

Besides, after driving 1900 miles, and being so screwed up with sleep...it felt nice to just lay in bed for the better part of a week, sleeping, cuddling with my dogs, and getting re-focused. Been getting all my errands and 'to-do list' stuff done over the past week as well. Wanted to go work out...but this scratchy throat and chest congestion have kept that from happening. 

This weekend in Pensacola, at the Dog Track over there...they are having a $50k Guarantee tourney, for a $700 buy in. There is a $100 mega for it tomorrow night (Thursday) that I might go over and play. My buddy James Ray has a place on the beach, and a boat...near Orange Beach...so I might stay there Thursday and Friday...and play the tourney on Saturday. It will also give me a chance to check on my rental property in Pensacola, as well as get a tuneup and oil change at my Toyota dealership over there that my buddy is the service manager at.

The last time I played at Pensacola Dog Track...some old, half-asleep guy slammed his truck into my 4Runner as I was leaving. I never have had that work done...so maybe when I get my car fixed for my recent damage, I can get that one fixed too. My poker experience over there wasn't very memorable. It was very short-lived. I will take a much different strategy into this next tourney...knowing that nobody over there folds ANYthing. Play tight. Play the nuts. Extract value from nut hands. Period.

If this year is going to be anything like LAST year...well, then I guess I am about to catch fire. Last year...I pretty much spent the first 8 months treading water...just like this year...winning just enough to keep playing, but not enough to get ahead. So if I can somehow have a fall even kind of close to last year's fall...everything will be just great. But that's going to be tough...last Sept/Oct were incredible. I miss running good like that!!!!

My current hits for this month are at 8200. Whoa. The record was a few months ago...the month Osama Bin Laden was killed...I got a lot of random hits from the shot up face of bin Laden that I posted...which accounted for me topping 9k. With 5 days left...I have a realistic shot and breaking that record...and all from nothing but legitimate 'poker' hits. 

Oh...almost forgot. The pest reared his ugly, orange head again. Jeff Timms posted something on his Facebook last week about someone in Houston walking out to get $1200 to pay his insured 'marker' in a local cash game...but got in his car and drove away instead. I merely GUESSED at who it might be...and voila, was proven right. Never wrote about it, never even posted about it...merely guessed that it was 'his orangeness' and was told I was correct. Well, three days ago, Chad Burns invades my message box on Facebook...again. Using all the same stupid, tough guy insults...making the same empty threats. Squirrel was coming in from work, saw his name...and started to freak out.

"Again!!???? Will!!! WTF!???" Settle down Crazy Squirrel! The only thing that made me mad about the latest Orange Attack was her over-reacting thinking I did something to bring him out of the woodwork. I don't know what this guy's deal is...how he ever became such an incredible douchebag...or more importantly, how he pulls the shit he does in the greater Houston area and is still breathing air. Either Houstonians are great at making up stories, or they are just a bunch of total wussbags. Because...where I'm from...that guy would have been forced to move to another State a long time ago. Now...Texas, I understand is a very large state...so maybe they would allow him to go live in...say, El Paso...maybe Lubbock.

Good 'Ol Chad Burns...keeping that super-cool 'shirt under the shirt look alive and kicking.

Look at me...I am drinking cocktails...check it...see all those glasses sitting in front of me? Those used to belong to a girl. Notice how there are three of them? Yeah well...I guess when they walked away from me after another stupid one-liner they just forgot about their drink. MORE FOR ME!!!! Hahahaha LOL!!!

Yeah, his latest rant was that he 'heard' that I ran like shit all summer...that I bubbled nearly everything I played. Then asked how old I was again. Reiterating what a 'loser' I am that I have a backer at 44 years old. Then reflected on how disappointed my backer must be in me. Also mentioned that him and his 'boys' (God I wonder who constitutes THAT posse!!!) were in Vegas and that he spent hours 'looking for me.' All of this was especially amusing to me...(a) since I post on here or Facebook ALL of my results usually, rendering research virtually pointless (b) Finding me is like finding a gas station. Again...I post daily where I am playing. (c) anyone who considers ANY poker player...whether they are 21 or 51 a LOSER because they have a backer...obviously has ZERO grasp of how poker works, of the variance involved. Sure...the guy who clips a $1m score doesn't need a backer anymore...as long as he avoids managing his bankroll like a moron. But until I am that guy...I am eternally grateful for having a poker backer. 

It just cracks me up that every time this fucktard opens his mouth, he just keeps sounding more stupid every time. It is good for one thing though. It makes him a lot easier to just laugh at and not get upset over. 

Still watching 'Inception' and still ridiculously confused. I think its time to just give up on this movie.

Spent about three hours last night perusing Ebay and several other online sites...trying (to no avail) to find a replica of the Missing Raising Monkey. I really want to find a replacement...and not just some run of the mill Monkey...but T-H-E actual Monkey. I've never seen another one like it in 8 years...and just have a feeling it was a one-of-a-kind. 

So I am told by a few guys that I have GOT to get on BoDog and play...that its super, super soft. Um...well, okay...thought about it...and was about to try and get money on there, then today I read that they will not seek to renew their gaming license at the end of this year. That they will honor the ban on US internet poker. So forget about that one. This is such bullshit. Okay...its been what? 4 months now? How long is it going to take for the US Government to get this shit ironed out? Ive never seen more hypocritical horseshit than I have from the past two administrations.

Yesterday, I did decide to try playing online for the first time since May. So I logged onto FeltStars...which doubles as Lock Poker. I bought into a $5/18pp SNG...because that was the only thing I could find that was about to fill up. And I won that shit. For $45. Hip Hip Hooray. After that game...I was sleepy, and logged off and took a nap. Lately, sleepy is how I have been feeling about 18 hours out of 24 a day. That's kind of freaking me out, too.

Happy Birthday to my friend Allie Prescott...who like me, hasn't moved since we got back from Vegas, though I know its his plan to get in his car...and drive to Florida, where he plans to live and become a full-time cash game player down there. That is definitely the right place to do it. 

Okay...see ya later!

MONKEY