Back at the Beau

HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM THE ZOO!

whatdy'a get when you cross a Monkey with a Squirrel?
That seems to be the million dollar question!
Cant wait to see the answer.

I notice my front page column/blog thing keeps falling further and further down the page...wow, I guess the pressure is REALLY on to win something pretty soon to keep from slipping right off the bottom!!! Well, the Gulf Coast Poker Championship has begun...and the year has gotten off to a very inauspicious beginning for Senor Monkey.

Should start by saying I failed to lock up a seat into the PCA tourney in Atlantis. A 2nd ($2100) and a 3rd ($1600) in Step 6 softened the blow and gave me a nice bankroll on Stars, but its another year of failing to win that damn trip. Had several top 30 finishes on Stars in the last week but couldn't make a final table (the REAL money) as I kept getting rivered and getting clipped before I could revel in the glory of a big score...but I have that balance around 5K as I take a time out to try and rack up some early final tables and make an appearance in the TOP 10 list on CardPlayers Player of the Year standings.

Making final tables in January is HUGE...to get that recognition at the start of the year can be very beneficial in securing a lot of things. Respect, notoriety, possible 10K backing, possible deals somewhere. Its just a GOOD month to do GREAT things. So I was/am REALLY looking forward to this event at the Beau Rivage.

I found out in the first two days how many people read this blog. Wow! I must have had at LEAST 20 of you come up to me and comment about stuff I've written on here. That's really cool. I mean, for me...really (and honestly) this is just a healthy outlet for me to vent usually. And today's entry I hope is somewhat therapeutic, before I go back tonight (SUNDAY) and play the 2nd chance tourney at 7pm. A lot of you ask me "what do those guys pay you to blog," and of course my answer is always..."PAY ME???!!!? I should pay THEM for letting me write there!

I love it. Except of course when my stupid mouth/pen/keypad gets me kicked out of casinos for a few months for choosing the incorrect usage of words! (stupid monkey) I know there are a bunch of guys (bigshots) who get PAID by CardPlayer and some other sites to blog on their sites. If I ever break through to the BIGTIME and get a deal like that...well, that will just be like 'stealing the pooty' (JERRY MAGUIRE reference) for me!!!!

Where do I start? With today's horrid cooler? Or just start from the top? Lets start with some GOOD NEWS first.

I think I gave you all the heads up on my first big no-brainer investment of the year. FREAKING OIL. Instead of bitching and complaining all the time about gas prices, I decided to do something about it. From the school of 'if you cant beat 'em, invest in em' thinking...I loaded up on 235 shares of USO, getting in at around $27.50 a share. USO (United States Oil Fund) is an ETF(exchange traded fund) that basically mirrors the price of the barrel cost. With a very slight differentiation.

I am not a big time investor, never have been. But common sense was telling me that oil could NOT possibly go much lower. Then the Israeli's started fighting with Hamas. And Russia and Ukraine are going at it. While Russia and those OPEC scumbags are plotting together to drive oil production down. Also, you have Russia getting buddy-buddy with Venezuela...so you know THEY will be working to drive oil costs up again. Why Russia, who has also been running military op's with Cuba and Venezuela down in the Caribbean, refuses to let go of Cold War ideals is beyond me.

Wouldn't it be so much wiser for them to be our friend? Some old habits never die, it seems. Our military is so superior to theirs, and everyone else's for that matter....Russia is just asking for an ass kicking if they start fucking with us. Good luck you assclowns. So anyway, my little 235 shares of USO is now trading at $35 in just a week since I've held it....making me a cool little $900 profit so far. I envision it getting to around $75-$80 within the next few months....maybe higher if the shit really hits the fan over there....at any rate...I will immediately sell it if it should get as high as $100 a share.

More good news. Ya'all know I run these pools. Some of you have started playing in them. In 13 years, I have been the winner of these pools VERY infrequently. Last year I won the bowl pool, and $2500. It was awesome. Kicked off my new year, and subsequent AWESOME 2008 in grand fashion. Well I was leading the Bowl Pool again with about 8 games left...until the wheels just fell off. I have a shot at 3rd now (out of 153 entries). Whatever. But....in my Survivor Pools....whoa! I have a $100 (one time rebuy) pool, a $25 (one time rebuy) pool and a $50 (one time rebuy) MidSeason Survivor Pool....I'm alive in ALL of them. In the $25 pool, we went into yesterday with 11. First place...$6500.

I took SD. Only one to take them. Several took INDY and ATL. See ya! In the MidSeason I took ARIZONA! No one else did. We started the day with 52. Ten went out with ATL and INDY. First place? $9500. In the $100 I gambled and took MINN (the only one). Six remain. One guy took ARZ yesterday. First place? $15,000. EVERYONE in both pools has either BALT or PHILLY today. So conceivably, if MIAMI (not gonna happen, they just got creamed by Baltimore) wins, and MINN wins...I could WIN the $25 Pool AND the MIDSEASON POOL outright! How sick! And be heads up with the other guy in the $100. Yeah Miami just wrecked that dream...and the Philly/Minn game has just started. GO VIKINGS!!!!!

I did make a nice little insurance alliance though...with 3 guys in the $100 (out of 6) and 4 guys in the $25 (out of 11) so no matter what happens, I should win SOMETHING at least! I'm not sure how good it would be for my Pool Business were I to win all of my own pools!!!!!

Okay. Shall we talk poker?
Or shall we first discuss some FRESH IDEAS FOR THE NEW YEAR......????

FRESH IDEAS FOR THE NEW YEAR #1
Can we maybe get someone to put Nancy Grace on "The View" and let all of those crazy bitches just KILL each other? That is my own personal wet dream. I would watch it EVERY freaking day! Can you imagine being Nancy Grace's husband? Whoa...and you think YOU got a bad beat today!!!!!???

FRESH IDEA #2
Can everyone please come up with some new 'catch phrases' for those moments after they win a big pot? SHIP IT? DEAD! Pass the (______) whatever your gay-ass word is there.....DEAD! "One time baby" Gotta go! "THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT!" Please put that one in deep freeze. I promise to commit to this effort if you all will!

FRESH IDEA #3
When you are driving around town...and you see someone trying to pull out of, say...the bank, Wal Mart, a video story, a fast food joint....and you aren't in a hurry to get anywhere...especially to that light 200 yards away that you can see is RED anyway? How about this.....how about letting that person into traffic? Instead of being a dickhead and speeding up and making them sit at that damn spot!??? Can you ALL please get on board on that one?

FRESH IDEA #4
Its January folks! Lets not leave our Christmas lights and decorations up/out until May this year, okay? Either get off your ass and get it done, or give that little kid who comes around knocking on your door soliciting for errand work a couple bucks to do it for you!

FRESH IDEA #5
Girls do it. Boy do they do it. Baby showers! And wedding showers! Why cant guys? Fellas....dammit.....Ive been holding out for over 40 years before getting married and having a kid. I want a DAMN WEDDING/BABY SHOWER! At a strip club! A nice strip club! MAKE IT HAPPEN!

[Adrian Peterson is down on the field, appearing to be injured, in a game they are trailing 3-0. This could be very bad for Senor Monkey!]

FRESH IDEA #6
Before I die of a heart attack, or my back just completely goes out one day and renders me virtually paralyzed...would someone please appoint themselves my personal drill seargeant, and come to my house every day at, say...1:10pm, KIDNAP me...and take me to the gym, and whip my ass into shape? From the time of this writing til, say...DEC 30th, 2009? Thanks.

I had a whole bevy of fresh ideas the other day. They were coming to me like crazy. I have forgotten a bunch of them. I will get to the poker stuff...if a fresh idea comes to me...I will just drop it in spontaneously!

Spent New Years Eve playing cash game at Hard Rock. Bought in with $400. The room was FULL! Weird. Almost took a picture. Saw lots of fellow players I hadn't seen in awhile. It was pretty fun. For awhile. Stack went from $400...to as low as $180, and as high as $650 over an 8 hour period. Then it happened. A couple new players showed up. And proceeded to somehow piss me off. One was an old guy who decided it would be fun to start showing me bluffs after I folded the best hand. I love it (as you all know) when people show me bluffs. Then this little asshole Asian kid showed up and decided it would be fun to start raising $30 to $50 bucks every time there was a raise of $10 or $15 followed by two calls or more. So...what did I do? I made things personal.

Where did that get me? Broke. And in my car at 5am..driving home...getting as high as I possibly could before I got home and had to deal with Squirrel asking why staying at a piece of shit cash game on New Years Eve was more important than coming home and spending the rest of New Years Eve with HER after she had gotten off at 1am. High seemed like the best solution because clearly, I did not have a reasonable answer to that question. Lucky for me she was asleep when I got home. Wheeeeewwwwwww!!!!

DAY ONE of the BEAU RIVAGE.

Friday. My day to go back. Jan 2nd. Room opened at 6pm. I didn't know there was a 7pm tourney. Wish I had. There were over 300 players....first place was $15k! SHIT! Instead I sat on my couch til 10:30 watching Alabama get the crap kicked out of them by Utah. Thanks Andre! Not sure how a team who so heavily relies on their offensive line to protect their 'barely above average QB' can be expected to play well after losing their best player and having to move three of their players to other positions. Answer? THEY DONT. UTAH KILLED THEM.

I get to the Beau Rivage. Go find Squirrel. Give her a "boy your team looked terrible" hug...and go to the poker room. I walk in and WOW...the room is HUGE! And looks awesome! Huge ass TV screens in every corner. Gigantic tournament clock for us guys who have almost lost ALL of our vision. About 70 to 80 tables. And the room was PACKED. Cash game was blowing UP! I cant wait to find some action.

I get into a SNG immediately. And on the first hand of the year....my first hand BACK at the BEAU....sitting in fourth position...behind a guy who has limped in for 50...I look down at AA. No way! Wow. And I say..."wow! really? First hand!?? Am I going to take a bad beat on my first hand back!???" The answer? Of course....is YES. I raise to 175. Other guy calls. Flop comes 299, two clubs. Seems like a good flop. He checks. I bet 450. He calls. Lovely. 222? 9-something? Calling a 175 raise? Flush draw? Turn is the J of clubs. UGH. Flush? A nine still? He checks.
Checks? WTF? Do we bet there? Do YOU!??? And if so...how much? We started with 2000 chips. I already have 625 in there. I check. River....FIVE. He bets 375. Value bet? Jeezuz. Whatever. I call. He has.....pocket fives! Ta-da! WELCOME TO 2009! I go out of that one a short time later.

I will spare you all the various SNG details from the next two days. But the long and short of it is this. The players are really shitty. I have played 16 sngs so far. I have won/chopped or cashed in 6 of them. My buyins are $2150 so far. My winnings are $2600. So I am about $500 in that department so far. Of the SNGs I have lost I have run QQ into A10. Ace on the turn. This was a guy who raised UTG, got RERAISED by a guy with 99..and called my ALL IN...with A10. Sweet. Lost another with JJ vs. 88 when the clown rivered an 8. Lost another with AA vs. 77. Realistically, I should be about 10 for 16, which would be a great clip. But whatever, you are always going to face SOME bad luck. But I have been seeing a LOT of it early. Which is why I am at the house right now, chilling out...writing this.

In the tourneys so far....good gawd. Saturday's tourney. First of all....let me say a few things about the Beau Rivage. NUMBER ONE. Thank you very much Ken Lambert and Johnny Groomes for finally deciding to let me return. Ken came and talked to me in between hands. Was very nice. Told me they all discussed it at pretty great length and decided it was the right thing to do, and the right time. I was very gracious, and WILL go to great lengths to keep things 'in check' to avoid a repeat incident.

The room, looks awesome. The structures....mmmm okay, I guess? Not too thrilled about going straight from 100-200 to 150-300 with a 25 ante. I really find the 100/200 with 25 ante to be the best round in poker. Then go to 150/300. And if you are going to have a 150/300 round...then why no 75/150? There are a couple more rounds later that get omitted. It is a structure that requires you to chip up early. The first event attracted a WHOPPING 1005 entries. By the dinner break at 6:30 it has dwindled to 180. WHAT??? Yeah! That is a structure issue there, folks. We started with 5000 chips, which I think is FINE/PERFECT!

[ADRIAN PETERSON JUST RAN ABOUT 40 YARDS FOR A TOUCHDOWN!!!!!!!! VIKINGS UP NOW 7-6!!!!!!!! HELL YES!!!! ]

There is no gift/souvenir stand set up like there was for the event last year. I thought that was very classy, and actually was looking forward to seeing it. Mainly because I am still smarting from losing my cool hat, which I flung in the air in New Orleans after ANOTHER river beat...and it didn't come back down! People still talk about that. Not sure what they talk about more....the HAT IN THE RAFTERS AT HARRAHS story, or the one about when I SMASHED ALL THE NERVES in the TOP OF MY FOOT after I kicked a chair (WITH MY BOOTS ON, NO LESS!) at the IP event a few years ago....which sent me to the floor in the perhaps the worst pain I have ever felt in my life! You would think there were 10,000 people in the room that night!

The other thing that bugs me...and again, that IP did a really nice job with, is the food situation. I like it when casinos treat us like guests...and not CUSTOMERS. IP was bring food in for all the players. I thought that was very classy, and a nice gesture. I think all the players really appreciated it. At this event, and in past events at the Beau, there is a food bar set up outside the poker room...where we all have the option of paying WAY TOO MUCH for food that we could get for free downstairs.

Even at the World Series this year, the food that was offered out in the tent was a LOT less than what they are selling it for at this event. That bothers me. Makes me feel like the players are being taken advantage of a little bit. Whatever...I'm just choosing to eat NOTHING, and lose some much needed weight!

I registered early to avoid the lines. THE LINES. Ugh. Why? The night before they closed registration at 9pm. NINE PM. Why? You KNOW you are going to get PUMMELLED the next day. One thing the IP really did right at their last event was to leave registration open til midnight. That was a very smart move, and one that I would think the BEAU would have done without even thinking twice about it. But they didn't, and the line the next morning was disgusting.

They had alternates still coming in at LEVEL FOUR! Which I thought was retarded of those players. Call it a day man, get your money back..and try tomorrow! They were using the tables downstairs in the poker room for overflow. I drew one of those tables, even though I got out of bed and drove down at 8am to register early. Because of having to enter all my NFL PLAYOFF POOL picks into a spreadsheet, I arrived about 20 minutes late. When I got to my table, there was a dude in my seat. What the hell? We had both been given the same seat. Lovely. So I had to wait about 15 MORE minutes for them to get it figured out and me a new seat.

Once seated I noticed a disturbing thing taking place....right about the time Gabe Costner was busting out in seat 3. I guess a few hands earlier he had run JJ into KK with a rag flop...and left him shortstacked; they were using the AUTOMATIC SHUFFLER. Gabe hates that damn thing. Well, I have started to as well. I really am starting to think there is something to the notion that those things aren't TOTALLY random at all. Well, upstairs...there are NO shufflers on ANY of the tables. They were NOT supposed to be using them downstairs. I know that for a fact. But they were anyway. So I'm not sure seeing 30% more hands helped or hurt me, but it just wasn't very consistent.

The prize pool was massive. No one really knew how many spots it would pay, or what first would be...but the guess was about 90 spots, and $75-$80K for first place. When it finally got posted, it was paying only 63 spots. SIXTY THREE? That had everyone talking. I mean that was great if you had a big stack...because the money line was $850 (on a $340 buy in)...a great opening pay line...but hurting those who had labored for ten hours and could really use ANY cash.

First place was only $65K. That also had everyone talking. I have no idea what percentage they were basing the payouts on. But it looked like the money was kind of bottom heavy...which, in my opinion...is a good thing. I have always felt (especially online) that the prize money is always way too top heavy. You play THAT long...and seemingly ALWAYS take a horrid beat to go out way earlier than you should/deserve I think you should make a decent amount of money for your ridiculously long day of work. So if that is the case on the payouts....GOOD!

The dealers they have assembled are pretty good. Didn't notice too many rookies. Cocktail service is pretty solid. Nikki, Peggy and Danielle are doing a great job running the satellites. How they are doing as many as they are doing without a list and/or a line is beyond me, but they are. Not a single fight or dispute yet among anyone. Maybe its because they just have so many tables and dealers.

At any rate...a lot of money can be made in SNGs if things go right...and I LIKE THAT! Its been confirmed that I will NOT be able to play the Main Event...that sucks. But I only have one MOM, and she needs me out in Seattle to help her recover from surgery...and so I will fly out of here on Monday to take care of her for a couple of weeks. Then my next action will be in February at the Venetian.

[PHILLY JUST TOOK A 9-7 lead with ANOTHER FIELD GOAL. LOTS OF FIELD GOALS...MUCH BETTER THAN LOTS OF TDS!!!!! ]

TOURNEY 1. I was pretty card dead all day. I had a couple of maniacs at my table. One guy admitted he was playing his first tournament. He was in the risk analysis business, so he had a firm belief that "there is no such thing as a good or bad hand." One of those guys. And he played that way. So playing back at him was very scary.

[ INTERCEPTION....ASANTE SAMUEL....TOUCHDOWN EAGLES....FUCK! 16-7 PHILLY. NICE PASS TAVARIS YOU CLOWN! BTW.... NICE NAME! ]

I hovered around 5000-7000 for the first two levels. Both decent hands/pots that I won I bluffed to win. Always scary. Our table finally broke, and I get moved to a table with my buddy Tim Hebert, and this black dude in a VELVET track suit...who somehow has managed to chip up to over EIGHTY THOUSAND in the first three levels. Keith the dealer tells me (on the break) that the guy is a total fish...who just hasn't missed ANYTHING he has played. Great...one of THOSE guys. Perfect. Well...I sat there and blinded down to about 3400. Tim raises from 200/400 to 1300 UTG...and I look down at JJ on the button. I go all in. Tim tells me "You got me Monkey, I don't have anything" as he turns over A6 clubs. Board comes K-2-3-4-5.....for a straight. AWESOME! IM OUT!

I go play some SNGs...win 2 out of 3...got my confidence back, and buy into the 7pm tourney, which again has over 300 players. We get to level 2, my table SUCKS. I mean.....REALLY BAD! So I have decided to play relatively tight...to weed through some of the assclowns. Cant help it though when I pick up KK behind two callers of 100. I make it 425. The first guy calls. The other folds. Flop comes 10-10-2. He bets 1200. Huh? What are you guys thinking? Same thing I was? He's putting me on AK...and he has like a pair? Of probably something between 4's or 9's? I raise him enough to commit myself. We get it all in. The moron has Q10 offsuit. Have a nice day Senor Monkey. I'm out early.

TOURNEY 2. Sunday....$550 buy in. See Jim "Smokey" at the table next to mine. As well as Brandon Jarrett, my new buddy and recent successful tourney player and fellow blogger? Is that what I heard? Maybe? Anyway...he tells me about an amazing cash session he had last night. Me, him and Jim decide to do a $200 last longer. I have a great draw...table 71, seat 6. A very late breaking table, good seat, right in front of the big screen. This could be a GREAT day! Right? Brandon loses a big chunk early with KK vs. AA. Then he gets clipped for the rest with AA vs. 33. Stupid 3 on the turn. He's out.

Jim has about 3400 of his original 6000 starting chips. After evaluating my table it is decided (by me) that I am easily the best player at the table and that their are maybe two other worth a shit. Could be, indeed...a great day. Things start suddenly looking VERY rosy...when after limping in for 100 with QJs...and talking to Brandon (who just busted out) I flop As-10s-6s! WHoA! Second nut flush with a ROYAL FLUSH DRAW. First guy (loosest guy at the table) bets out 600. QUICK NOTE:

Three hands before, I took a bit of a gamble. Figured...early...a good time to do it. Loose boy down there raised to 400. He has done this SEVERAL times already...so his credibility is questionable.

[ADRIAN PETERSON....TOUCHDOWN! GREAT DRIVE AFTER THE PICK-SIX THAT JUST HAPPENED. PHILLY 16-MINN 14. GO VIKES!!!! ]

I call the 400 with 99, one of my favorite hands. Lately though...I have been KILLING EVERYONE with 55. At Hard Rock the other night....I picked up 55 six times...flopped a set with it FIVE TIMES! UNREAL! Anyway....sorry.....I call the 400. The next guy re-raises to 1200. OH SHIT. ACES OR KINGS! Has to be. First clown calls! Oh wow. Decision time. 800 to call a 2950 pot. A chance to catch lightening in a bottle and maybe be sitting on around 12 to 15k early...if things go right...like....I FLOP A NINE! Do you guys make that call? KNOWING you are behind? Or do you gamble? I gamble. I call. The flop comes 8-2-3. Rainbow. Ughhhh......that's a bit of a tease flop, wouldn't you say!??? Well, I KNOW I'm no good still. Dipshit bets out 2200. I instantly fold. The original raiser goes all in. Jackass calls...with 77. OH WHY OH WHY couldn't that second guy be short stacked preflop? I would have won a HUGE side pot!

[ INTERCEPTION on 3rd and 1, strange play call, BY THE VIKINGS WITH THE EAGLES IN SCORING TERRITORY! SWEEEET!!!! CHANCE TO TAKE THE LEAD BEFORE THE HALF! ]

So the guy with KK doubles up through our neighborhood donkfish...and he is left with...well, 325 more chips than I have. How do I know this? lets continue the story.....

I call the 600 with my flush. The next player ALSO calls. Sweet. The turn is a harmless 4 of diamonds. He bets 1200 now. I raise this time...with Brandon watching (and approving, I know this cuz he has that goofy smirk on his face) to 2800, thus sending him the message I want to be all in. I only have 675 left. He moves all in and says "well if you have the flush you got me"....music to my ears...as I was only fearing the King high flush there...but was 95% sure he didn't have that....was putting him on the ACE with a worse spade for a kicker. NO spade....he has A10.

The dealer is Larry, and older guy who I am very chummy with. The thing about Larry though? He is prone to cooler my ass. In fact....he almost leads the league in that category. Well, his history adds another chapter to the already jam-packed novel, when he slips the 10 of diamonds on the river...giving the villain (VILLAIN! THATS FOR YOU ALLIE PRESCOTT you bitch!) the full house....and sending me writhing in pain on the floor. Larry gives me that "I know you aren't going to talk to me for days" look and I just sit there feeling like I have just been shot. About this time I hear the guy in the One seat...who is missing a hand (LITERALLY missing a hand, not a reference to cards there!)...say "at least it will be quiet around here now"...and I start to think of ways to fuck with this guy. But as I look down at my 325 remaining chips...I realize this is going to be pretty hard...unless I figure out a way to chip up pretty damn quick.

What is the deal with people who like a 'nice, quiet poker table?' I don't get it. What is so bad about talking with your fellow players? About having fun while you are playing? Why does it annoy people when I am chatty? I think I keep things fun. I get a LOT of players telling me I make it so much more fun. And at times I see tables around my table always looking over, and you can see the looks on their faces. They are jealous...because they can see how much fun our table is having. And they aren't having ANY at ALL!

FRESH IDEA #7
Players who are intentionally trying to kill my buzz...by being grumpy...or pissing me off for no reason? New TDA rule for 2009...THEY get a penalty! Until they can come back to the table and be pleasant, and have some damn fun...they will sit out!

Back to me and my 325 chips. Jim...now seeing a chance to scoop up $600 of last longer money.....FUCK!!!!....comes over and puts a $50 bounty on me with my table. A good move. I had already put a $40 bounty on Brandon at HIS table...which I had to pay! Which Sucks! Jim should have had to be in for half of that! When I made the offer, Jim wasn't in the last longer yet. Another bad beat! Should say this....the dealer, a gal I had never seen before, suspect she is new maybe...heard us talking about the bounty and last longer and decides to interject her opinion on it. "I think the last longer bet is okay, but I think it might be a Gaming Commission violation to do a bounty on another player."

I tell her. First of all, we are all good buddies, so the bounty, isn't us being ugly, or trying to put that player at an unfair disadvantage, and everyone at both tables realizes this. I isn't a TDA rule, or a Gaming violation...to my knowledge, and this HAS been covered in the past....but it is an etiquette issue. You're half right. A lot, maybe MOST...casinos/poker rooms will NOT allow you to put a bounty on another player. If you do, you MIGHT incur a penalty. But given the circumstances, I think this one will be just fine. If you don't THINK so...you are welcome to call the floor over and find out. I am not about to get back INTO the Beau only to get into trouble for something as trivial and stupid as a $50 bounty against one of my good friends in a $550 tourney where we are all playing for over $50,000!!!!!! She let's it go. Then she gets pushed by Larry.......ahhhhh Larrrryyyyyyy!!!!!

With 325....and sitting in second position, and the blinds 50/100...I pick up 22. I move all in. Everyone folds around to the annoying lady in the BB...who starts chirping about the last longer. Great...I feel like a guy laying in the desert...with his arms bound behind his back...and his legs in shackles...as the buzzards circle overhead. I feel a little (heavy emphasis on the word little) better as I flop a TWO! But it is LARRY THE HUMAN REFRIGERATOR...and I completely expect, in fact, I believe I SAY "no problem, I'm sure there is an 8 coming" as an 8 hits the turn. Then you hear that sound...you know the one......ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.....yeah. No 2 on the river. IM OUT! I slither out of there...head to valet, and get the hell home! Where I now sit. Squirrel just tried the 'ol 'wanna come to Wal-Mart with me' move again. You know that move right? It should be called the...."please come to Wal Mart with me so you can pay for everything" move! I have made four trips to Wal Mart with her in the last 21 days...and I have spent OVER a GRAND! AT FREAKING WAL MART! Yeah...no thanks sweetie...I'm good!

I'm pretty sure this has become another very long entry. To all of you playing at the Beau right now...I am sincere when I say...it is GREAT to see all of you again! I am SO happy to be back in at the Beau Rivage. I really, really missed it. I love this life I have, and not getting to play there was really a bummer. Cheryl is a lot happier because of it too. Now I just need to keep my nose clean! I will. I will still talk a lot, and I will still have fun...I am not going to change who I am, or how I play...but I will do it all within the rules, and between the lines of right and wrong. I love you players who 'give it back' to 'ol Monk...it makes it a lot more fun! Don't take my shit...GIVE IT RIGHT BACK! I like it! We will probably become good buddies in the end! GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU THIS WEEK, I hope I can get lucky and snap SOMETHING off before I head out to Seattle on Monday!

TAKE CARE!

http://www.gulfcoastpoker.net/