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Sunday, February 12, 2012

Get Ready to Die...Zombie Mutants!!!

Today, I am going to ignore the negative. Did I just pull another 0-fer yesterday? And the day before? And the day before? Maybe. Maybe not. I'm not going there. I am also NOT going to address the death of Whitney Houston. Too early. And too sad. Not going to talk about my hotel switch due to my becoming an official 'resident' in the eyes of Las Vegas law...which apparently happens after 28 days in the same hotel.

I refuse to address the insanity of the retard running the poker room at IP during graveyard...or the front desk's inability to answer the phone...EVER. Won't talk about why Subway at Casino Royale always closes every night between 2:23am and 2:45am because their 'systems are down.' Won't babble on about how my lovely wife is up in North Alabama today for her first of two Mega Baby Showers for Carley Grace...who is already the most spoiled child to ever not even be born yet.

I won't even talk about my decision to take my diet up a notch...by deciding to go on a self-imposed hunger strike until I make it back to a final table. ANY final table. No...sit n go's do NOT count. Not that it matters, since SNG's seem to have vanished from the face of poker. FML.

Nope, today I shall talk about me and Wonky's grudge match with the poker world. I like to call them Mutants. She prefers Zombies. She harbors the same disdain for OMRG's and OLRG's...in fact, she coined the phrase. Yes, I will give her creative credit. Here is Wonky...after her devastating victory in the nightly at Venetian three nights ago. And two days before she did me the pleasure of doing my laundry!

My alter ego in crushing souls
Today at Caesar's at 4pm (22 minutes for those scoring at home) is the Valentine's him/her team Mutant Destruction tournament. We contemplated going to buy T-shirts...to wear as a team. A little something like this.




But since we are both lazy sloths, who like to sleep in...we didn't make THAT happen. You've heard me talk about Wonky before. She is the one who is married to the F-15 fighter pilot. Who bitches, whines and rants about other players better/worse than I do. The one who when I'm running like shit I can go to that will actually make me feel normal, and sometimes better. She is without a doubt one of the better female players I know...which should make us a powerful duo today as we take on whatever the poker world decides to throw at us.

Yeah....bring it on...suckers! While the one teammate is playing in the tourney during his/her 15 minute 'shift' they will be running a parallel cash game table...where we are able to play out of the same stack. I am honestly looking forward to a day of crushing souls...and dreams...and having the joy of doing it with a friend who can derive the same amount of joy from it.



This should be the look on my face....ALL DAY...as I wreak havoc on all the opposing players. I really hope we make the final table...because holy crap...its been two days since I ate...and I am freaking STARVING!!!!!

Okay...gotta go.  Oh...props to Justin Booth for his CHOP/CHOP-SHIP/SHIP in the big 600+ two day tourney at Venetian. Special thanks to Brett Allelo for shipping me (overnight) his miracle Kidney Stone evaporating pills from Louisiana (effectively the ONLY good thing to SHOW UP from Louisiana this year so far!) along with a special gift of beef jerky!

MONKEY




1 comment:

balt999 said...

I played in that couples tournament (we went busto early)..Saw you with your "monkey" jersey #8...I laughed when you shouted at your partner to go play the cash game, "The Stack don't play itself!"...lol!!!