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Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Let 7 months of Boredom Begin

The worst part about the Super Bowl...is when it's over. No I'm not talking about that thug Terrell Suggs in his post game interview..though that was pretty nauseating. Or watching Ray Lewis and his phony act...good gawd how annoying did that become? And no its not the blow to my pride that comes with making a bad prediction. (San Fran 23 Baltimore 16). No...the worst part...is realizing that we have lost football, pro and college...for 7 long months. 7 months of NASCAR, Baseball, March Madness, The Masters, The NBA Finals....that are supposed to fill the void that football leaves. It never does. National Signing Day looms...where we get to see how much stronger 'Bama will get through the recruiting process...and to an extent...The NFL Draft...where we get to see what holes our favorite teams will fill.



I can't complain, I had a pretty good Sunday. Won exactly $6,000 in squares. Granted, I was invested for $5650....over 14 different boards. The game itself was pretty awesome...at least, the second half. Or rather...the Post-Power Outage portion of the game. How wild was that? I sat there scrolling through all the Facebook messages and saw some of the most hilarious and creative comments ever. I don't know if we will ever know what happened when those lights/power went out...but I'd like to think it was New Orleans' big EF YOU to Roger Goodell. I loved seeing him in interviews all week talking about 'how wonderful' everyone had been to him all week, and how much New Orleans was admired by him and his whole staff. Can you say......PEEEE AARRRRRRR??? I'm sorry, but I KNOW the city of New Orleans. I KNOW those people. There is no way...no effing way...you can convince me that he wasn't catching shit everywhere he popped his big ground hog head up.

Late last night...on Lock....I was cruising along to two more Final Tables....where I finished 3rd both times...after holding sizable chipleads most of the tourney and final table...the first with this shove tard jamming into my BB with me sitting on AA and mumbling to myself...."come on fucker....do it! Do it again! Shove! Do it!!!" only to have him do it with J10...and flopping Q-9-8. Huh? You gotta be kidding me. Then...in the next one, in almost identical fashion....a guy from a place that was spelled out with characters not existent on my keyboard...who had been shoving on me over and over...does it again with KQ. I called with AQ. And the King on the flop held. At any rate it was another winning session. 

During my run I encountered the most incredibly rude, racist, offensive and just downright horrible person I think I've ever run into online. And what made it worse? It was a woman. Or at least 'she' claimed to be. Her/His/It's user name was PrettyMom. Yeah...real pretty. She claimed to be from New York. Big shocker there. Well...earlier in the night...playing under a different handle...the player min raised. I called with a big stack on the button with A8h. The flop comes 9-8-4. One heart. She bets...but an amount that felt like it was just a c-bet. So I floated...or called with the best. The turn was a 3. Non-heart. I had 7500 in my stack. There was 1400 in the pot. And she just shoves for 4500. Felt like an AK move. I managed to convince myself that I was making a sick call on a good read. So I called. ( the buy in was only $10...and it was a rebuy) I was wrong. She had QQ. Whoops. I rivered an ace. Hello! Well, she didn't rebuy. And spent the next 15-20 minutes on the cyber rail, letting me have it. 

I was the worst player ever. I was a fucking moron. Then she starts calling me a n***er. Huh? A piece of shit this, I mean...wouldn't stop. I never retaliated. I told her. I'm sorry about your beat. Honestly...I put you on a big ace....and you missing the flop and turn and trying to take it down with a bluff shove. Your bet made no sense...so I called. I was wrong but got lucky. It happens. Perhaps before you go screaming and yelling and name calling...you should look in the mirror, at how you played it, and find the mistakes in your own game. That only made it worse. So...she sticks around and continues to berate me. Then there was this play:

I was sitting on a huge stack, was chipleader in the tourney. We are at 200/400 and I have 32k. Player limps behind me for 400. I'm at cutoff with 77 and make it 1200. The SB shoves all in for 2800 and the big blind ships all in for 3400...and then the guy who limped...hesitates...thinks (probably about the value he is getting to call) and shoves as well...for about 3800. I have them all covered, obviously. And with about 10 or 11k in the pot I have to call a maximum of what? 3k or less? So I'm getting about 3.5 to 1 to call. I'd have called with 25 at that point. So yeah I call. SB has AA. BB has QQ...and the other person has 66. I flop a set of 7's. A six hits the turn...and I hold...and take out all four players. Then the chirping starts! From that person.

You are the worst player ever! You called three all ins as a 9-1 dog! How do you make that call!?? I go on to attempt to explain to the 'uneducated one' by correcting them. I was accused of limping for 400 and calling off the 4000 or so. Uh. Wrong. I raised the limper. To 1200. Check the hand history. Troll. And then I was getting MORE than the right price to call...and had more than enough chips to gamble in that spot. It was embarrassing that this person was so inept at figuring this out...and was sitting there screaming that I was an IDIOT and a MORON. Then it dawned on me.

Whoa! I think...to a less degree, obviously, that I might have used to have been THAT PLAYER once upon a time. Like...back 8 years ago. That would play online...be in that spot...and go mental on someone. Not understanding the full scope of what had just transpired, math-wise. Or situation-wise. I mean...it was never to this degree...this person was just a straight up imbecile. But I can almost promise myself that I was guilty of teeing off on someone when it was actually my bad play that had probably put myself in that position. I know that my play has improved ten-fold since those days...and I know that I bring two completely games to the table when you are talking about LIVE vs. ONLINE. You have to.  To that end...I sit online and watch just god awful play, and I don't let it affect me like I used to. You can't...or you will go berserk. Like the past few nights I've been playing .50/$1.00 fixed limit Omaha 8 or better. I have never seen such awful play...and haven't taken SO many bad beats. But I have literally not lifted a finger to type something in the chat bar. Why? Seriously? Why bother? Yeah...they might be a dreadful player...but for one? You will never convince a person that they are terrible. I mean...have you ever met a poker player who literally confessed to be horrible?

And for second? As bad as they play? You are going to get paid off by that person almost every time when you DONT get sucked out on...so you have to just learn to play good pot control against them....to minimize your losses, while maximizing your wins...which, of course is a LOT easier to do when playing Pot Limit than it is Fixed Limit, obviously. But still...even in Limit, there are times when its advised to lead out on the flop and turn...and times when its best to just check call in anticipation of a monster 17-out drawing hand. I mean...if I flop a 17-outer...and there are 3 or more players in the hand? I am putting money in the pot with the intention of NEVER losing that hand. And if I lose after betting the flop as well...so be it...but there are times when you have GOT to get as much money in the pot as possible. Then you can control things when you are drawing thin by just check calling...and if you hit, check-raising the turn for 4 bets and regaining that missed value from the flop. Its not that complicated...but its amazing how that concept is likely foreign to the majority of the players who play online. To those 'good' players who are reading this for whatever reason you read my blog for....you just read that last paragraph and are probably muttering something like "no shit Sherlock. Thanks Captain Obvious." And maybe some a little more obscene. I get it. You get it. But its amazing how many do NOT get it. 

Where was I?

Oh yeah...that bitch from hell. So I did something I almost NEVER do...I ratted her out. I even warned her. Told her I was affiliate for the site, that I do a radio/podcast that they sponsor, and that I have a direct line to CEO Jennifer Larson. I told her the way she was talking was totally offensive and inappropriate and that she should refrain. What did she do? Tells me Lock doesn't care about cursing. And went on a bigger tirade. Okay...so on the next break at the :55 minute mark I sent an email to Jennifer. And to my delight/surprise...woke up today to an email back from her...and two other people in her department,  declaring that Lock Poker in no way condones that type of behavior...and hopefully...that person will be banned from the site. I mean...I've never been big on playing the rat role....but this lady...wow, she was horrendous.

I won't be online much this week...as I have GOT to get all of my pools reconciled, the payments collected, and prize winnings paid out before I leave for Palm Beach on the 11th or 12th...depending on who is riding down with me. I think most of my 14 investors for Oklahoma are going to be in for the Palm Beach package...and I'm glad. Most of them got roughly half of their money back from there...so very little money will be required to fund the Florida trip. That's what 4 min cashes will do for the backer bankroll, I guess....Stupid min cashes....UGH!!!

Congrats to a guy who sent me an incredibly nice message today on Facebook. He claims to have been reading my blog for years...and credits my blog with helping him and his game. How flattering? And somewhat, not kidding...humbling? Well...he just snapped off Event 11 up in Tunica...winning his first WSOP circuit ring and a healthy amount of cash. And in the midst of that 'riding on a cloud' feeling...took the time to send ME a message on there? Pretty cool! So yeah...congratulations to one of the good guys in poker....BOBBY BYRAM, JR!!!!! It always makes me smile to see people I like, respect and admire winning big tourneys. 

Okay...Carley appears to be waking up from her little nap. Squirrel is having about 6 of her girlfriends over tonight for dinner and cards...and Carley will be undoubtedly passed around like a little hot potato, so I thought it would be a good idea for her to be fully rested. I will probably make a trip to the gym while they are screaming and hollering all night.

MONKEY

2 comments:

Bobby Byram said...

Thanks Monkey for the nice comments,and thanks for sharing your hands with your readers,it helps more than you know. Ive been a reader since you schooled me in Tunica a few years ago. During a hand you ask me if i knew what El Diablo was and i said no,and you said, you should read my blog. Well,I did and ive been hooked ever since. I played with Allen Kessler at my starting table and then moved to Carwashs table next,and then Cowboy John lands table to end day 1, and having the time of my life. Poker needs more Monkeys and Carwashs, you guys know how to have fun and be yourself. P.S I still cant belive I binked a ring!!!!!

Anonymous said...

The monkey shit show is going busto again. Makes many of us happy. Enjoy the free fall.