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Sunday, May 29, 2016

SCANDAL ROCKS THE POKER WORLD!!!!

I do not say this in a self-serving way, I promise. But to post a blog, about scandal in the poker world, and having it NOT involve myself, is well, refreshing to a degree.

Now, on the other hand, the fact it involves a guy who I have admired for over a decade, and been friends with...saddens me. I've basically labeled Nolan Dalla the 'Greatest Blogger in the History of Mankind' on numerous occasions, and its pretty effed up that his blog (ironically) is being used AGAINST him, by the girl who is accusing him of wrongdoing. It all makes me sick, for a variety of reasons.

The 2+2 trolls, those pack wolves of the poker world, have been frantically and enthusiastically weighing in with their self-professed 'expert' analysis the last 3 days on the whole situation. I think any of you who have read my blog over the past 8 years are acutely aware of my disdain for the weasels and fucktards who call 2+2 their home. Bottom line, I simply have no use for humans who feel they are qualified to weigh in on the character of a fellow human they have never met or interacted with...or to make judgments on a situation they are 100% NOT involved with. Who simply arrive at their conclusion based on nothing but hearsay and conjecture. [in the comments section below I respond to a reader's comment wherein I'm accused of being a hypocrite here]

Are you living under a rock? Are you unaware of the scandal? I'm trying to give you the best crib notes without having to give you the whole nuts and bolts...since my purpose for writing today isn't to explain what happened, but to give you my opinion of the whole mess, since I DO happen to know Nolan quite well...as well as the scenario in which the allegation was rumored to have taken place.

Let's do it like this: Here is a link to Jaclynn...I'm sorry, DOCTOR (though she isn't a practicing doctor, choosing instead to bypass the medical profession for a life of reliable, steady income in the lucrative field of cash game poker) Jaclynn Moskow.  Just click her name there...and it will take you directly to her blog, where she drops the hammer on not just Nolan Dalla, but three other industry professionals, I'm sorry, make it FOUR...she also includes Shaun Deeb in her diatribe. 

Fast forward a couple days...to where she goes on a live podcast with Joe Ingram. I wasn't familiar with Joe..but have to say...despite him talking just a little too fast for my liking, he does conduct a very good interview, and asks excellent questions. In no way was he pandering to her. 

The contrast we see, is him talking very fast, and her talking verrrrry slow, almost like she was encouraged by someone to take a couple downers before the interview, so as to come off sounding calm, cool, and collected. Beware, and this is simply a warning...the interview is extremely hard to get through all 90 minutes of. For me...her whiny, nasally voice did things to me that can really only be found when I watch and hear Hillary Clinton speak. It was rough. And...as one of these 20's and 30's-somethings...the word 'like' and 'actually' are featured prominently in her vocabulary which drive me insane...no matter who it is. If she were to eliminate the word 'like' from her arsenal, this interview would have easily been 20-30 minutes shorter. 

Now, in an attempt to give you all sides of this mess...before rendering my opinion on the matter, I must give you Nolan's official response to the shit storm. Let me try to see if I can relocate that...as I've been taken all over the map trying to see everyone's two cents on this matter.

NOLAN'S OFFICIAL RESPONSE...and the 2+2 THREAD

Now...I understand that some of you may click on that...and NEVER RETURN to my blog here...and might actually miss my 'take' on the whole mess. I guess I can live with that. It's fine.  After all, I didn't even mention that today is THE BIG DAY in the world of 10-14 Wanna-be Grinders/Minions, as tonight, they tee it up to become the 3rd official member of the team...in an event at Kai Landry's crib. Just found out last night...that Lord Puddingsworth (alter ego) will be awarding the winner...in addition to a $10k seat to the WSOP (which, frankly, should suffice) the big, ridiculously gaudy trophy that he has been working on for months....that was SUPPOSED to go to the winner of his 3rd tournament with the name that is so long I can't even begin to try to repeat it. I won the first one...and proceeded to streak through his neighborhood with the 'Hubcap Trophy' as promised. Danielle Stewart, who angrily chimed in on Facebook yesterday as I did when we found out the trophy and title would be doled out tonight in a tourney we don't even get to play in....won it the following year, losing my respect when she refused (not adamantly though, we'll call it hesitatingly) to repeat my feat of the prior year...streaking through the neighborhood with the newest HubCap Trophy. She lost a little bit of my respect and admiration, I can't lie. Well....anyway, someone...probably in the wee hours of Memorial Day...since I have created an AWESOME structure (with 20 minute levels and 20k starting stack) is going to walk way with this new trophy. I will be sure to post lots of fun photos from the event. I am then planning on (if they aren't sold out) procuring a cabana at the Golden Nugget for Memorial Day for the moms and their kids and myself. Squirrel should be getting home from Baton Rouge around noon...after being gone all weekend participating in that country music fest thing up in Tiger Stadium...her and her three friends...all recently divorced...in an RV. Needless to say...they are having what we will just call F-U-N.

Lets get back to the story. Are you ready for the link to the podcast? Now..if you didn't already vanish from this post...this will definitely probably spell your goodbye...because this thing is 90 minutes long. But its important for you to watch if you want my full assessment to really count.

JACLYNN  MOSKOW podcast interview with JOE INGRAM

Now if you are still with us...me more precisely...I would like to start out my 'assessment' of this situation, by giving you my somewhat humorous assessment of Miss Doctor herself. Pretty sure we all watch Family Guy, right? Or have at some point in our lives. And do we all not find Stewey to be the most amusing character on the show? Of course we do. Are we all familiar with Brian....and his past relationship with Jillian? The ditzy blonde? If not...then click this link below..because this is my impression of Nurse Jackie here.



Are you still here? Because you are dying to hear my 'take' on this shitstorm? Well...then wow, I am shocked and surprised, and frankly...honored! So then...lets get into it. The good thing for me...is I basically am retired, have no job where I answer to anyone, have nothing that can really be ruined...like so many others in this PC world of ours, and have crafted a life where my opinion can't destroy me. That feels good. That being said...I DO actually care what those I respect and admire think about me, and to an extent...my opinions on matters like these. So...with that being said, let me just be perfectly clear on one very important point:

Sexual harassment and sexual assault are VERY VERY serious allegations...and are never, or should never be...laughed at, made a joke of, and certainly never should be ignored. Women who I am close friends with certainly know my stance on this subject. I've always regarded a woman as someone who should garner the utmost respect, never to be struck, never to be objectified, and certainly never to be touched in an inappropriate way that isn't welcomed. It's a problem in today's society...I think we all recognize that. And as it is at the heart of this scandal...it must be taken seriously. Conversely, and to the point of why it has erupted as such a scandal, is the unfortunate scenario in which 'some' women have used this delicate subject to manipulate a situation for monetary gain. Or to essentially ruin someone's career, marriage, or reputation. Or all of them, in some cases. That is why this is such a touchy situation. Those of us who care mightily about the plight of women trying to be treated equally and fairly...don't want to risk alienating them by throwing this woman under the bus and siding with Nolan. And there are surely those who find themselves wanting to believe the woman in this tale, but not wanting to see Nolan's career ruined. Like I said...its a really really rough and touchy subject to deal with.

People, quite a few, asked me what my take was. Asked me if I was going to blog about it. I guess my opinion is valued by a handful of people. Not sure I want that dumped on my plate. And my immediate response was that I was going to kind of let it cool down first, and gather as much info as I possibly could before making any opinions public. Well...I think I've seen and heard about all I need to now. Again, my opinion could be dead wrong. But it's just my opinion. But as someone who thinks I've got a pretty fair ability to read other humans, I tend to go with my gut reaction. And my gut reaction is such:

Jaclynn Moskow is a woman who is without a doubt intelligent. But she is very mediocre at everything she has ever tried to accomplish. While she is a doctor, there is no proof that she ever passed her boards or got a residency at her very mediocre and shady medical school. About the only thing she has to show for her time in medical school is the claim of $200k in student loan debts. She flounders around in South Florida, calling herself a 'professional cash game player' which to me is as glamorous and legitimate as the old lady with the slot glove who calls herself a slot pro. It's laughable. Her claim that she passed on a medical career to be a poker player instead is pretty interesting, I'd say. I'll just leave that one there.


HAPPIER TIMES

So let me tell you how I think this all went down. First of all...I like everything about Nolan's response except for one thing...and I will tell Nolan this face-to-face as I would ANY friend of mine; the claim that he wasn't familiar with the term 'motorboating' struck me as a little hard to believe. Like me, Nolan is a bit of a wordsmith, and furthermore, is very in touch with the current trends and buzzwords/buzz phrases. His dripping sarcasm and dry sense of humor and wit...is what makes us friends. I just can't convince myself that he doesn't know what 'motorboating' is and wish it hadn't been part of his response...because some of us who really know him had to have kind of cringed a little bit when we read that. And for some less willing to hear him out, it might have just flipped their on/off switch to the off position as it pertained to hearing him out. 

Then again...I could be wrong....maybe he DIDN'T know the expression! In which case...wow...that's a shocker! Personally, I've never motorboated any woman...nor do I find it something I have ever wanted to perform on a woman. I just think it's kind of stupid. It's right up there with that stupid finger-lizard-tongue thing that some guys do to a woman that I guess is supposed to signal a desire on their part to perform fellatio on her. Ridiculous and sophomoric. I've always been very blunt, refusing to beat around the bush (no pun intended) so if I wanted to perform such an act...I would tend to just tell her point blank..."you know what? I bet you have a fantastic pussy! I would love the chance to circumnavigate it some time!!" Finger-lizard? Get the fuck outa here.

Sorry...got a little side-tracked there. But back to the 'motorboating' thing..because I just feel like talking about it some more. I just realized...I have not done it TO a woman...but have had it done TO me. At a strip club. Where the girl, usually after you've tipped her (or in the effort to garner one), comes up, tells you her name...and then sandwiches your face between her tits, as a way to show her gratitude I guess. I've concluded there are two basic reactions to this act by men: (a) the guy, like me, who looks completely uncomfortable, embarrassed even...and sits there, very stiff and upright and awkward...waiting for it to end...then looking around to see if anyone he knows was watching. Or (b) the guy who soaks up every second of it...even tries to slip in a little nipple lick...moving his head back and forth...probably even doing the little motorboating thing with his lips...which I am going to imagine cause the stripper to think to herself  "My gawd, what a creepy little pervert this schmuck is!!!!" before his 'time in heaven' is over and he rewards her with a crisp one dollar bill. That's all I've got now, on the 'fine art' of motorboating. 

So back to what I think happened. And again...this is ONLY my opinion, I have NO PROOF to support my opinion. NONE. So please don't judge me. This is ONLY my OPINION! And its based on my history with poker players, with TV production crews, and 'wrap' parties (gatherings that take place after a show has finished taping, yes...I was an actor in my previous life!). Mixed with a little common sense in dealing with fellow human beings.

I think that 'it' totally did happen. But that it went down this way: A bunch of drunk people at a bar, people are doing shots through their nose (which I wasn't even aware people were doing these days!) and getting even MORE fucked up than usual. Her boyfriend is there with her. Its nearing closing time. Nolan drunkenly compliments her on her ample bosom, her boyfriend giggles in agreement, she laughs along with his comment. Nolan then recklessly, but playfully...buries his face in them. Who knows, maybe he even did a shot with her breasts serving as a support structure for the shot glass. Everyone gets a good laugh out of it...a little cheering ensues. Everyone leaves in a jovial mood. The next day...they are buddies. The following week they go paint balling together. Next month...still cool, exchanging friendly emails. But whoa...wait...

Suddenly, her use of the contacts she had made through him aren't paying off. She's not being invited back to the show by the powers-that-be. All of a sudden, after starting to feel jilted, she starts feeling now that the whole scene in the bar might not have been as fun as she thought it was. Instead...she starts feeling like maybe she was being clowned. Maybe just maybe...she was being harassed. Sexually. This is something relatively new in our society, something the experts label 'withdrawal of consent' which we can thank the feminists for. Basically, it means "we get a little drunk, then we fuck, and its all good and fun until two weeks later where I realize I felt pressured or that I was slightly intoxicated and therefore couldn't POSSIBLY have given consent...hence, I was, ahem...RAPED!" Completely insane...but something which now has legal precedence. It is what has me really, really fearing for my friend Nolan. Because I've been a part of scenes like that in the past...maybe not as the central character, but definitely a person in the room. It's a chilling scenario, and always a possibility as something that can happen to you if you are dealing with someone who isn't wired like the rest of us. (or more accurately, those with whom's views I identify with)

To make myself the person in this story...and lets just say I was with my wife, who also happens to have a pretty amazing chest on her...it would likely go something like this: We are all out...drinking, having a good time. Someone like Nolan or another one of our drunk friends...says something silly in nature and maybe cops a feel on one of her boobs. I am annoyed, but I realize its harmless and let it go. (it has actually happened in the past) Besides, my wife knows when enough if enough. She can fight her own battles on that turf. It would be irrelevant, probably not even discussed on the drive home. Its just a symptom of being in a bar at 2am where everyone is comfortable with each other, and with the assistance of copious amounts of booze, feeling a little free with their actions! People at those hours tend to get a little frisky. I sure as shit know I do! And I'll be honest, I've done and said some things in that state that came back later to bite me in the ass a little bit. So I try to (a) not drink too much and (b) be respectful to my wife in the company of her friends and/or co-workers! 

So if you are in that bar at 2am? And someone grabs you, pulls you into a broom closet, and forces you to give them head, or lifts your skirt and tags you from behind? That? Is fucking rape...sexual assault...and whoever does it...needs to not only be fired from their job...but to see the inside of a jail cell for a long time. But motorboating a gal who has been drinking with you all night? In front of the whole world to see? That just makes you a drunken fool...who might need to just apologize the next day if the 'victim' seems like she was bothered by it. Period. End of story. Again...my opinion. At some point, a woman has to accept a little responsibility, I think. If you are in a bar, shit faced, or even a little more than slightly drunk...at 2 or 3am, doing shots...and you are offended by ANYTHING? You need to get the fuck out. Like, immediately. But by staying? And participating in the 'madness' then you are making yourself liable for whatever shenanigans might transpire. Within reason, of course. Now...for you hardcore feminists...I can already hear you saying "But wait, Monkey...you're just shaming the victim, because shouldn't a woman be able to drink in a bar without the fear of someone assaulting them?" Save it. Sure...sure they do. And you know what else? I should be able to drink in a bar without worrying about two guys busting in wearing ski masks, robbing the place...and shooting me when they mistakenly thought I was reaching for a gun when I was just reaching for my cell phone to call 911. 

So...nearing conclusion...I merely suggest that 'something' definitely happened in that bar that night. I just can't bring myself to think that this girl is anything other than a woman who didn't get her way, wanting to be included on future episodes of the poker show, and after getting shunned, retaliated in the way she did. As far as her accusations against the other men...all in about a 24 hour period...I literally felt like I was watching the movie 'Gone Girl' where a psychotic female gifted with a very creative imagination and a way above average intellect, crafted a whole scenario designed to make herself look like a huge sympathetic figure in all of this. I mean...seriously? The Jew comment? Then Nolan's alleged blacks comment? A random, inappropriate ass grab by a staff cameraman? Topped off by a 'passing comment' in the hallway by a poker player (Shaun Deeb) with a good name and reputation, where he is alleged to tell her why women will never succeed in poker? Yeah...sure...that is something I often hear players doing while passing other players in the hallway or lobby of hotels, the 'ol 'Drive By Mini-Seminar!' Its like she sat down at the kitchen table, with her notepad, and decided which men were going to star in her dramatic production, and gave each of them their individual role in shaming her. 

Bottom line: I don't buy it. I think she is full of shit. A corporate lawyer for the show...who caught wind of the whole mess...allegedly tried to make it all go away by offering her $15,000 for her silence. She contends she turned it down because of her desire to be some kind of voice of the oppressed. Horseshit. She turned it down because she is smart, because she knew if they were willing to throw $15k at her...that it was their lowest possible offer. So she is playing the game. Which, if you read her blog...is pretty much verified by the closing line of her post...where she tells Nolan..."You're Move!" It's rumored that she countered with a request for $100k. I can't confirm that. [Matt Glanz has publicly posted an email sent from Moskow to Rush Street Productions where she specifically counters with a 100k offer]

But it fits the narrative. I see her as a nobody, trying hard to be a somebody...and in the process destroying careers that have been built over decades of actual performance, production, and earned respect. To attempt to use extortion to pad her stats in the poker world while maybe wiping out her mountain of debt from medical school is disgusting. IF..in fact, that IS what she is doing. Again...these are only my opinions. 

IF you check out Twitter, or the 2+2 thread...she is actually garnering a lot of support, driving a massive divide, a wedge, between the two sides of this scandal. The ones that take her side...are incredibly angry about it. Those who aren't buying her story are a little more chill about it...choosing to sit back, view it all with more common sense. It's truly been a very polarizing scandal. It kind of reminds me a bit of the current presidential race. Both sides are easy to dislike or be mad at. But both sides also seem to be sympathetic figures. Its confusing, and mysterious. Exactly, I guess, what the poker world was hungry for. Because, God forbid...we didn't have the occasional scandal to keep the goobers on 2+2 entertained, and with something to do to drag them away from their Open Faced Chinese, or their online session made possible by an illegal internet connection established through a foreign server. 

I don't know how this will all turn out. As my friend, I hope Nolan escapes it relatively unscathed. But I worry for him, because he works for one of the most 'corporatee' companies I've ever known...where any semblance of 'egg on the face' almost always leads to a washing of the hands by them. It's the society we now live in. There is no longer a presumption of innocence until proven guilty. That's a joke that died a long time ago. Now? You are basically FUCKED and good luck undoing the FUCKERY of what just happened to you. It makes me sick. It makes me thankful...beyond belief...that I no longer work for a company that can toy with my career and my life like a cat with a ball of yarn. That I now have things that can't be taken away from me because of some accusation that is lobbed my way. I am not the person who, in a way I deem to be nothing more than cliche, sends 'thoughts and prayers' to people to make-believe convey my concerns for them. Instead...I just try to offer something sincere and thoughtful when they are faced with a massive amount of adversity.

Before I conclude, I would like to point you (those of you who are still on board and not off reading the marathon thread on 2+2) in the direction of my fellow GulfCoastPoker blogger, Jennifer Gay-Pique, who happens also to be the wife of our 2016 Team Grinder member Steven. She has offered up her take on this situation as well...and from more of a female's perspective.  I admit, I share a bit of the same views as Jenn...with politics NOT being one of them. 100% anyway. We agree to disagree on some things. Like Donald Trump, for example. Not going any further into that, however. But you might want to check out her blog on this subject at BELLA DONKEY. Enjoy!

And with that...and I'm sure I could have probably written a LOT more about this subject, but I was trying to keep it as brief as possible. Plus...me and Carley need to make a run to Wal Mart in preparation for tonight's gala event at Sir Puddingworth's Estate. Bye for now.

MONKEY

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