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Saturday, May 30, 2009

Saturday Sapphire Sun Sluts

We could call this a fantastic day off poolside were it not for last nights $$$ debacle.

There was another huge-field $340 today (went out at 7pm lasþ night about 180th'ish) that I'd liked to have played but making the Final Table would screw up tomorrow's $1k at the Rio that I already signed up for.

Keith screwed up. Some VIP party at 9pm at ND Fuegos for Lacey Jones turned out to be tonight and not last night so at 10pm we were in the 'what the fuck to do now?' Mode.

So went down to Amazon to see my buddy Frank Kasella who was one from the money (and eventually cashed) in the 40k event.That got boring fast.

Then it began. "Let's go play a SNG." We take the last two seats on a $275. At 25/25 him and I both call a 100 raise. Me with AJ. Flop comes J-9-7 rainbow. I announce that I'm check-raising. Raiser bets 250. Idiot Keith goes all in. I call. Original raiser folds. Keith shows Q-7. Assclown rivers a Q. Out! Then doesn't even win it so I also whif on the buy-in refund.

I then play three more $125's and lose them all in about the same glorious fashion. Heed warning if you are coming. These players are fucking horrible. 95% of these faces I have NEVER seen in my life. This summer could be scary.

I've had enough. I go to my room. Or try. But I get intercepted by the Texas Hold Em casino game. Doh! Slap $200 on the table and spent 2 hrs creatively losing $200.

Two interesting things happened. Maybe ten. (1)a dealer,who I was TIPPING (the only player tipping him btw) rats me out to the floor when I tell him "dude if you put a 2 on the river I'm gonna kill you.'Floor Dork pulls me off the table to 'discipline' me for 'threatening' the dealer. Omg, realllly? Wow. (2) Next dealer sporting a 1985 Dee Snyder hairdo, who I nicknamed RuleBookBecky comes in and starts hen-pecking me on every little nit-picky rule. Then (3) I had to deal with the hooker who sat next to me and looked for reasons to like me despite my being as rude and mean as I possibly could. Maybe if I had been nice to her it would have resulted in her blowing me off instead hounding/pestering me to death. I finally told her "listen, I know what your deal is okay? I should just tell you...I'm gay. " That did the trick. Thought about going with "I'm engaged" but knew that would just bring the 'ol "what happens in Vegas" cliche so I went with Homo Boy. Ship it. Got to room. No Keith. Texts me..."Playing 50/100 HORSE come get me!" Screw that! Its about a 5 mile walk to that room. Plus I was too tired!

Wake up at noon. No Keith. Wow. Don't even want to know. Get my shit to go to the topless Saphirre Pool. Arrive. 25% hot women. 45% decent women. 30% fat, nasty skank, which probably includes ME! But there is SUN, pool, food, drinks...and of course...titties. And no poker! Will do that party at 9pm tonight and play the 1k Sunday at Rio.

Can I say something? Who likes Kanye West and why? His music comes on and it makes me jump in the pool and hide underwater. Sorry bout your Mom and all, dude...but your music SUCKS BALLS!

Went to Mark Ecko yesterday after busting out at Venetian and treated myself to 4 new pairs of jeans, 1 jacket and 8 t-shirts. That was fun!

Okay that's your daily update, all hen-pecked from poolside on my Blackberry...my new one...who's camera works (and already has 5 donkeys stored in it). Have a delightful weekend!
Monk-Zilla out!

1 comment:

Jay said...

Wow, agreed! Hate Kanye West and love Mark Ecko. Weird. Good luck out there. Jay